I'm not known for having the best luck in the world. On the contrary, I am known for being fairly unlucky in life. I once dropped my phone down the toilet, just an example. I'm also not known for my elegance and grace. I have been known to walk into lamp posts.
My luck levels were still low when I left work last week. Let me set the scene for you; 18:30, rush hour in London, there is a nip in the air and the sun has been gone since lunchtime. Many a people are rushing in their winter coats and rucksacks, overtaking fellow pedestrians as if it is a race to see who can get to the tube first. That particular evening, I was one such person.
As I was weaving in and out of the crowd, I checked to see if I had any texts on my phone, which I did, and thought to myself I'll read these as soon as I get on the bus. As I was thinking this thought, I was not aware of my surroundings, or aware that I was in fact walking quite speedily towards a knee high concrete wall. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I bumped into and fell over this wall.
When I rolled onto my back and stared at my feet hanging over the other side of the wall, I thought Oh my god. You absolute fool. As I slowly began to get to my feet a man came over to me enquiring after my health. To which I replied quite dizzily, 'Errrr yeah I'm fine.' He then followed this up with another question, 'Did...' (he paused) '... did you just fall over that wall?' I must admit the dear fellow seemed as confused as I. There was no way to answer that question other then, 'Yes. I did.' I then urged him onward with his journey insisting that I was fine. I then noticed that on top of bruising my knees and spraining my wrist, I had smashed my phone screen and my glasses had taken quite a hit too. Eventually as I got to my feet filled with mortification and irritation, I continued to the bus stop, I couldn't help thinking, This is going to be funny in a couple of hours as I shed a quiet tear. This was out of pure shock and embarrassment.
Even though this whole incident cost me (literally and also physically) in damages, I do now find it all rather funny. I also now realise that it could be written into an episode of Miranda. All I want to know, is this: why was there a knee high concrete wall in the middle of the pavement?!!!
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